Hope

Yesterday at mass, I had this really neat moment listening to the readings, which I will admit that I was barely listening to anyway, but the part that I caught said, "Hope will not disappoint."  I have been feeling hopeless lately.   Not hopeless in the way that you may think.  I have not given up, but I feel hopeless in a sense of understanding and accepting that things will happen as they happen, and what I hope for will not likely change what God already has in store.  Hoping is so uncertain and the possibility of getting let down is so strong that this feeling of having hope is so much more daunting that people give it credit for.  This has been a really recent development in my heart, taking root in and branching forth from my vice of envy.  I do not want to hope for the same thing that someone else is hoping for, because only one of us can "win" in the end, and if it is not me, I will be upset with myself and probably with God for a while.  So to nip the problem in the bud, I just stopped hoping and told myself that I was trusting God's Plan.  His response was in this reading, saying, "Hope will not disappoint" and that is something that I really will trust. I suppose the most logical answer to this at this point is to hope for happiness, or to hope for assurance. To hope for things that God will always provide.  God would never deny us love, even if He denied us the answer to one of our daily prayers, because love is something we all need all the time.  Meaning, if we hope for the things that we need, we will truly not be disappointed.